Sometime I think of starting a new Blog called "My FAIL of the week". The problem with that though is that I suspect that I would be posting on it various times a day... Well that would just be embarrassing LOL. If I ever do though, It will most certainly begin with this story :
I was at Walmart today, buying exciting things to add to my hip and kool wardrobe(Socks). The store was nuts, everyone back to school shopping, almost made me feel guilty that I wasn't buying binders and pens(Not guilty enough I guess, as I didn't buy any). As I was leaving I saw this older and somewhat portly lady, struggling to hold the door open and push her cart through. Me being raised to be a gentleman immediately jumped to this womans rescue, with a hardy "let me grab that for you".
I know what your thinking, Heroes come in all shapes and sizes, but truly I don't want praise, just maybe the key to the city and a hero cookie, but back to our tale.
I grabbed the door and held it open for her, only for her to yell "NOOOO, STOP THAT". To which I gallantly replied, "It's ok, I'm just holding the door for you". She in turned continued to scream "LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!" Just then, the womans daughter arrived, right in time to stop her very upset Mother from doing a face plant in front of the store(have I mentioned that there was at this point a HUGE crowd watching us?). The lady then tells her daughter "I was trying to keep my balance with the door, but that man kept trying to take it away from me".. I apologized profusely to both the Daughter and the Mom, explaining what I was trying to do. The Daughter, who seemed kinder than I deserved told me that it was OK and everything was fine. The Mom though, kept looking at me saying "Why would you do that?" More apologies as I was walking away(hopefully before the police arrived).
If that wasn't bad enough, as I was looking for my van, some very tough looking dude walked by me laughing saying "Nice One"... and as I was getting into my kool mobile, I saw other people pointing at me and laughing.. and honestly , if I hadn't been the one to practically throw some senior citizen on the ground, I would have been laughing too. As it was though, I slinked into my van and was very grateful that this was not my local Walmart, but the one across town.
Well there you have it , I almost killed someone with kindness today. I think next time I'll ask before I grab the door... Keep the key to the city and the Hero cookies, I've got Oreos.